Monday, December 04, 2006

TODAY THE BRIS - TOMORROW THE WORLD!

first, i must apologize to madze for my tardiness in getting this post up - many extenuating circumcis...er...uh, circumstances...

our madze baby had his a coming out party ! he had the snip of a lifetime. i've asked madzionist to please present the winners of the baby shower party. here are his picks (he picked himself in a couple of categories!).

madzionist favorite table beer:

As Elbro said: Genessee Cream Ale

funniest delivery room story:

Gramma Z sent us a plant that had a "Feel Better" message and band-aids on the design. When we stopped laughing and told her about it she died of embarassment and had a new bouquet sent.

funniest labor room story:

Not a place where funny things happen.

the name game:

Baby Elbro

mama z's waistline:

whatever elbro said.

gift registry information:

Gift Registry

last but not least, a madze delivery story:

Not a delivery story, but the story of the week has been nonstop frenzy. Birth on Thursday, Shalom Zachor party Friday night, Bris on Thursday, family all in from out of town, Shabbos, etc...it's been overwhelming. No time to blog or to do anything but entertain and take care of the house and family.

a note from nanc:

i leave it to madze to disclose any personal information to those he wishes and those who inquire.

i'm off to shop for baby z-2!

p.s. it is perfectly clear that elbro has won this contest!

92 comments:

Mr. Beamish the Instablepundit said...

If Elbro keeps winning these contests I'm gonna go into the storm door bizness.

The Merry Widow said...

Nanc- The site is not allowing me to fill my cart, it ain't me, it's the site! Will try later!

tmw

nanc said...

it's working for me, tmw...hmmm...

Elmer's Brother said...

does this mean I have to send the trail mix back???

beakerkin said...

MZ

Do not tell the little guy this is going to hurt me more than you.

nanc said...

if you do, elbro - it could mean the end for you if there are no macedonian nutz!

nanc said...

soooooooo, beak - do you remember yours?

Elmer's Brother said...

while I was in the service one of my good friends had a baby boy at the naval hospital. He and his wife wanted their boy circumcised...but...before that could be done they had to go through "counseling". So there is a break in their counseling and while he was standing near a geedunk (vending) machine these two nurse come in and pretend he isn't there. They were having this conversation and they were railing against parents who were having their boys circumcised..."I can't believe parents could be so cruel"...."It'll scar them for life"....to which my friend replied...

"I don't remember it."

Elmer's Brother said...

oh there'll be nuts. I don't know about the rest of it.

Elmer's Brother said...

I'll get Jackie Chiles, my lawyer right on this.

nanc said...

elbro - i had a male friend who had his done at the age of forty for health reasons and he wished horrid things on everyone around him for a long time after...hmmm...eight days or forty years old...?

Farmer John said...

I know a rabbi who's wife sewed a wallet out of all his bris tips. Whenever the rabbi went going on vacation, all he had to do was take out his wallet, rub it and say "wallah!", and he never needed to buy a suitcase.

nanc said...

FARMER!

that's alot of bris - cut!

beakerkin said...

No Nanc I have no memory. Allegedly,
my severed part was used to make a wallet that grows every time it is placed in a pocket.

Farmer John said...

...not as many as the stereotype would have you believe.... ;-)

Elmer's Brother said...

come on FJ that sounds like a lot of hooooey








you know a rabbi? come on.

Farmer John said...

Able sacrificed his best... It was Cain who didn't distinguish.

The Merry Widow said...

Ooooooooooohhhh! Now I feel better about picking on Rob!
Ye Gads!

tmw

Farmer John said...

okay, you caught me eb. The knowing a rabbi part was made up. So was the suitcase thing. The rabbi's wallet really turned into a ski-tote.

Farmer John said...

He was a Polish rabbi.

Elmer's Brother said...

I'm so gullible, I really believed the suitcase part. Call me naive.

nanc said...

okay, laurel and hardly - time to talk matzo!

Mad Zionist said...

My sister freaked out about the bris before hand. She has a boy just 4 months older, but she, being completely secular, thinks the old fashioned moyle and bris thing is antiquated and that hospitals and doctors are the only way to go.

Also, the idea of a party with lots of brunch food, wine and scotch for a circumcision was baffling for her - and most of my family. Of course, once they saw how nicely it all went they felt differently, but it is really a microcosm of how secular views the religious, I think.

Farmer John said...

Non-observant Jews who don't celebrate Passover should be forced to undergo another bris...

Farmer John said...

...it would give 'em something to be thankful for.

Farmer John said...

Symbolically, I find the concept of a bris very appropriate.

Elmer's Brother said...

A circumcised heart is what I'm after.

Farmer John said...

I'm getting out of here before warren shows up with his hatchet... I've already shared enough of my strange ideas... and I don't want him deciding it's time to practice his axe-handling skills. Oy-vey!

Jeff Bargholz said...

Circumcision is the only thing koranimals do right. That, and covering up their ugly women.

Real cruelty would be leaving a boy's willy looking like a poodle's, and prone to infection.


Since when do nurses care about other people, anyway. All I ever saw them do is lounge around complaing about their jobs, and how they hated everyone. I worked with them for years, and will always detest them as a species.

Any nurses around here know what I'm talking about, and you know I'm excluding you and the other minority of decent ones.

Brooke said...

Waiiit a minute... We're talking about a bris and Warren's hatchet comes up?

YIKES!

beakerkin said...

Jeff

In Islam it is done at thirteen. Being awake for that experience must not be pleasant.

The Merry Widow said...

At 13 it'd tend to make any male cranky, probably for the rest of their lives! That may explain them!
When my son was born and I told them to circumcise him, it didn't get done right away. I had a c-section and the morning they were going to discharge me, someone finally told the doctor! Poor little mite didn't get released until 7pm! Cause he wouldn't pee! If they had done it when I had him, he would have been released with me! OY! My Dad was yelling at me for having him circumcised, but I stood my ground, helped that my late was too! I kept telling those nurses it was for his health, and they kept telling that was a lie. Guess that explains WHY he wasn't done till I was ready to leave the hospital, they hoped I'd cave!

tmw

Farmer John said...

As Herodotus wrote about the Egyptians in 440 BC...

They practise circumcision for the sake of cleanliness, considering it better to be cleanly than comely.

Farmer John said...

Okay eb, I'll bite. What for?

nanc said...

FARMER?

what have i said about no biting?!?

Elmer's Brother said...

It's in reference to the New Testament concept that Christians have a circumcised heart symbolic of their relationship with G_d. Like the actual circumcision represented to Jews their relationship with the Almighty.

a stripping away of our old sinful self and a dedication to God in our hearts.

Farmer John said...

nanc, I promised eb I wouldn't spit anymore, not that I wouldn't bite.

Thanks for the info eb. Is the circumcision of the heart primarily meant for older converts? It would seem somewhat unnecessary for newborns given the baptismal rite and the fact that a newborn isn't likely to have acquired much sin requiring circumcision of the heart?

I mean, I could see how St. Augustine could see it that way as an older convert...

Elmer's Brother said...

It's mentioned in the old testament as well sorry

I have never put much thought into the age of accountability question if that is what you're asking fj but I suppose that by some people's definition knowing it's a symbol of the cutting of the ties to this world that it wouldn't apply to children who aren't able to make that decision

it's not an actual rite or ceremony as you may well know

maybe you're just joshing me and I don't realize it

Mr. Beamish the Instablepundit said...

Jeff,

I got to know quite a few nurses when I worked in a liquor store.

Farmer John said...

Nope. I wasn't joshin' elbro. It's a new variation on an old concept for me and I'm trying to get a feel for it. It kinda implies a trimming away of spirit... hopefully a "bad" spirit or memory/desire whereas a circumcision is a trimming away of flesh that I wouldn't necessary characterize as "bad" so much as potentially un-healthful and temptation prone (sensitivity) in the "future".

To circumcise the flesh is relatively easy to accomplish, a physical metamorphosis of spirit would be much more difficult (ie - the Sun Dance) and a spiritual circumcision or excision could perhaps only be maintained through an absolute commitment to virtuous behavior... but I can't see how one could avoid sinning in spirit and keep one's actions in check without a venial/spiritual reminder to keep one from acting/lapsing into sin. It's one of those philosophical "generation from opposites" things.

Farmer John said...

I see it now and understand it. My bad. Thanks elbro. I think it boils down to the way I raise my kids and the standards I set for them, which gets programmed into their ego-ideals and serves as a repressive force in mind...a taboo, like against incest. One can't even think of it without explicit effort.

Farmer John said...

..the literal raising of a child in a Christian home best accomplishes the feat. (?)

Farmer John said...

...or Jewish. Sorry, I didn't mean to exclude.

I'm sure Baby-Z will get that circumcision of the heart, elbro.

Madze, you & Mrs. Z have a very difficult job ahead of you, and I wish you well.

Farmer John said...

...especially when Baby-Z claims in adolescence that her upraising "scarred her for life!"

...for which they should reply, "Yes, thank G_D!"

Farmer John said...

I pity the child who's parents will do anything to prevent their children from experiencing any suffering or pain.

Best start them out young.

Farmer John said...

erratum: his upraising.

I guess you can tell I was thinking about my own daughter at the time I wrote it...

Farmer John said...

Dr. Freud, your slip is showing...

Kelly said...

I have four boys who have all come under the knife. None of the nurses or doctors we encountered ever complained about the procedure.

I guess in my part of the country it is a little more accepted as the way things are.

Elmer's Brother said...

whereas circumcision of the flesh is an outward appearance of your connection to G_d, a circumcision of the heart a sign of the inward connection

John Brown said...

Congrats, Shitposter!

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nanc said...

you are not welcome here, brownie - sorry - invited guests only!

nanc said...

warren - please turn on comment moderation while i delete this fool's posts! thanx!

The Merry Widow said...

Oy, look what the rats dragged in! Can we scrub the stain out of the carpet? Or will we have to get new?
And that particular variation, very provocative to say the least! Looking to get himself arrested? Or investigated?

tmw

nanc said...

oops! i forgot the most important post to delete, but think i'll leave it there for madze to see.

not biting, brownie - NO! i will not visit your blog for a quarter!

Mad Zionist said...

I just banned the idiot at my site.

nanc said...

thank you, warren.

thank you, madze.

when will he learn?

nanc said...

think i'll take a nap...

no weazlpoopstains here...

Elmer's Brother said...

perhaps we should call the fire department when Stain comes around

FLORIAN said...

Well Well Well.....out from his exile returns the pro-terrorist and communist sympathizer!!! Life must be boring in those "southern" countries.

Farmer John said...

I guess it's time to start sharpenin' the ole tommyhawks...

Farmer John said...

...said the hedgehog to the fox.

Farmer John said...

FORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Merry Widow said...

Hey, Nanccan practice her golf swing, and I can exeecise my arms swinging iron skillets. A healthy workout for all!

tmw

Brooke said...

Just got here!

Repetitive behavior is often a sign of mental illness.

Brooke said...

Hey, it's been a few months since we've dealt with the stain. Got out of the clink, or the psych ward, did he?

beakerkin said...

One of the joys of Beta Blogs is deletion is a breeze. Browns comments never make it onto my site. It is fairly obvious whom is obsessed with whom.

They even tire of his act on Renegade Eye.

nanc said...

sorry weaz - i'll not have you harrassing my guests at this party.

Warren said...

One thing for sure, he's definately obsessed with Beak!

Farmer John said...

I think beak has learned all about repelling boarders...

nanc said...

yeah - how come beak's the only one who has a great beta-blog thing going? has anybody else been able to get one up and going? no they have not. seems to me, working for dhs has its advantages. nuff said. beak's a dhs insider. we are his minions...or bunions...whatever...

Farmer John said...

It's a brave new world in which only alpha's know how to properly use beta's. It is almost the year 104 AF (After Ford), after all!

And my mother was only a beta+

-John (Savage)

ps- Let's take some Soma and go to a feelie sometime.

Farmer John said...

& beak works for the Department of Hatchery's and Conditioning (DHC). So you'd better not tweak him off or he's likely to overfeed the next batch of decanted hatchlings.

The Merry Widow said...

Oh Lordy, FJ, that was a very disheartening book! Everyone so brainwashed and silly! Those in the know controlling all input, sounds like certain elements in our world today! Both the brainwashed and the manipulators!

tmw

Farmer John said...

Indeed. Sounds like something that needs tidying up...

Mr. Beamish the Instablepundit said...

FJ,

As you know, embryonic stem cell Bokanovskification is still theoretical.