Sunday, April 30, 2006

TA DA!!!

We have the NEW and IMPROVED, (insert drum roll here)


LONG RANGE!

Nanc has graciously, (cough, cough), acceded to my veiled threat accepted my invitation, and is henceforth my co-conspirator in crime blogging!

I expect there will be a fight over which name comes first in the profile list. Luckily I can't change that!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

36 comments:

nanc said...

well, you would, but only because somebody, somewhere told you that "w" comes before "n" - you must have been a very big part of the public school system.

nanc said...

p.s. - the ONLY reason he's sticking to this story is because of the velcro i taped to his forehead. insert a drumroll here!

the merry widow said...

Whooowoo! Congrats you 2! Warren are you sure you can blog with Nanc? She is a "contrary" you know? or did you? I may have to change my hoverround for this group! Sorry, Beakerkin!

tmw
btw GOOD MORNING!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations... but I notice that nanc's avatar gets 4x the real estate. Is that in return for NOT getting top billing?

...and nanc, FJ here, sorry for my gaff over at AoW's. Can you forgive me? I became a little "unbalanced" (nothing new about that).

While you're thinking about it...

ANNOUNCER:
And now... PIGS IN SPACE! Starring the indominable Link Hogthrob, the flapable firstmate Miss Piggy, and the inexplicable Dr. Strangepork.

(open to inner space ship. 3 seats: Strangepork on left, Hogthrob in middle and Piggy on right. The ship is leaning heavily to the right)

ANNOUNCER:
When last we left the spaceship Swinepork, the ship had developed a severe list.

HOGTHROB: (fiddling with controls)
Something has developed with the gyro-slopic --what do you call it Strangepork?

STRANGEPORK:
I don't know, but it's sure going to louse up our billard game tonight.

HOGTHROB: (points to Strangepork in agreement)
Right.

PIGGY: (moving to Hogthrob's seat)
Here, maybe I can fix it.

STRANGEPORK:
You?

(the ship is balanced.)

PIGGY:
Oh. There, I fixed it.

STRANGEPORK:
But all you did was sit in Link's seat.

HOGTHROB: (pointing down to his seat)
Maybe it took a woman's touch. Huh huh.

PIGGY: (snidely)
It's working, isn't it gentlemen.

HOGTHROB:
Let me get back to my seat here.

(switching seats again)

PIGGY:
Excuse me.

(ship tilts right again, a small desk lamp slide on the "dashboard" to the right also.)

HOGTHROB:
It's doing it again!

STRANGEPORK:
Uh, Piggy, could you come here please.

PIGGY:
What for?

STRANGEPORK:
Just come here.

PIGGY:
Oh, all right.

(more commotion as Piggy makes her way to Strangepork's seat. Hogthrob goes to Piggy's and Strangepork to Hogthrob's seat. Lamp slides, ship tilts to left.)

STRANGEPORK: (nodding to Piggy)
Link, I think we've found the answer.

HOGTHROB: (to camera)
Oh?

PIGGY:
It's a coincidence, Strangepork.

STRANGEPORK: (snidely)
Oh yeah? Why don't you go back to your seat then.

PIGGY:
I think I will!

(commotion as everyone moves. ship and lamp move to Piggy's movements. Piggy and Hogthrob are at Hogthrob's seat. They both eye the lamp, which has moved to the center.)

PIGGY: (pausing)
Uh, oh.

(she runs to her seat, ship tilts, lamp slides, to the right.)

HOGTHROB: (dumb realization)
Hey, I get it now!

(points to Piggy)

PIGGY:
One word from you, lard-lips, and your dead.

HOGTHROB:
As you wish, first mate FATSO!

(Hogthrob and Strangepork start laughing)

PIGGY: (enraged)
Fatso?! That does it!

(she chases them to Strangeporks seat, then jumps back to her's, causing Hogthrob and Strangepork to slide to the wrath of her Karate Chop.)

PIGGY:
Hiiiiii---Ya!

HOGTHROB: (shoving Strangepork)
Get her away from me!

(the process repeats. Hogthrob and Strangepork moan and groan, Piggy Karate chops again. Repeat.)

ANNOUNCER:
PIIIIIIGS IN SPAAAAAACE!


-FJ

nanc said...

oh, this is going to be TOOOOO much fun - thank you skillettmw and farmer - i just know you two will make this transition...er...uh...how shall i say this...well, when i come up with the right word, will let you know.

Warren said...

TMW, re, Contrary, Yes I "Know"!

FJ, No matter how we redistribute the "weight", I have the feeling, this spaceship will list pronouncedly to the right.

btw, Am I Link or Strangepork? ;^)

The avatar thing is a technical problem with my avatar. If I make it larger, it will pixelate rather badly. I might redesign it later on. I designed Nanc's avatar at the size shown and the detail shows best at this resolution. (Another story I'm sticking to!)

Warren said...

Whoops, I forgot to resize Nanc's avatar last night.

All better now.

Always On Watch said...

Warren,
I wish that your avatar were on my blog. Sigh.

the merry widow said...

No problemo-us O'Malley sisters have to stick together. Now the question, do you want me to pester Warren like I do r.m.? or not?
Warren- Of course it will have a "correct" tilt, just keep the bow pointing "up"! Strangepork, he figgered out that there prolem, yep!
Let the games begin!

tmw

the merry widow said...

P.S.- Your avatars have a rather interesting look, kind of intimidating! May the troll find it so!

tmw

Always On Watch said...

Warren,
You can shrink Rosie if you like, but send me the info I need to upload to AOW blog.

Look at the fool I am, trying to tell my guru stuff.

nanc said...

you ARE a guru, aow - now accept it!

i'm staying in the middle of the ship.

Anonymous said...

...nanc, no transitions. Every philosopher needs his Laura, every poet his Beatrice, every man a muse...for Wisdom is a woman

Hesiod, "Theogony"...

From the Heliconian Muses let us begin to sing, who hold the great and holy mount of Helicon, and dance on soft feet about the deep-blue spring and the altar of the almighty son of Cronos, and, when they have washed their tender bodies in Permessus or in the Horse's Spring or Olmeius, make their fair, lovely dances upon highest Helicon and move with vigorous feet. Thence they arise and go abroad by night, veiled in thick mist, and utter their song with lovely voice, praising Zeus the aegis- holder and queenly Hera of Argos who walks on golden sandals and the daughter of Zeus the aegis-holder bright-eyed Athene, and Phoebus Apollo, and Artemis who delights in arrows, and Poseidon the earth-holder who shakes the earth, and reverend Themis and quick-glancing Aphrodite, and Hebe with the crown of gold, and fair Dione, Leto, Iapetus, and Cronos the crafty counsellor, Eos and great Helius and bright Selene, Earth too, and great Oceanus, and dark Night, and the holy race of all the other deathless ones that are for ever.

And one day they taught Hesiod glorious song while he was shepherding his lambs under holy Helicon, and this word first the goddesses said to me -- the Muses of Olympus, daughters of Zeus who holds the aegis:

`Shepherds of the wilderness, wretched things of shame, mere bellies, we know how to speak many false things as though they were true; but we know, when we will, to utter true things.'

So said the ready-voiced daughters of great Zeus, and they plucked and gave me a rod, a shoot of sturdy laurel, a marvellous thing, and breathed into me a divine voice to celebrate things that shall be and things there were aforetime; and they bade me sing of the race of the blessed gods that are eternally, but ever to sing of themselves both first and last. But why all this about oak or stone?

Come thou, let us begin with the Muses who gladden the great spirit of their father Zeus in Olympus with their songs, telling of things that are and that shall be and that were aforetime with consenting voice. Unwearying flows the sweet sound from their lips, and the house of their father Zeus the loud-thunderer is glad at the lily-like voice of the goddesses as it spread abroad, and the peaks of snowy Olympus resound, and the homes of the immortals. And they uttering their immortal voice, celebrate in song first of all the reverend race of the gods from the beginning, those whom Earth and wide Heaven begot, and the gods sprung of these, givers of good things. Then, next, the goddesses sing of Zeus, the father of gods and men, as they begin and end their strain, how much he is the most excellent among the gods and supreme in power. And again, they chant the race of men and strong giants, and gladden the heart of Zeus within Olympus, -- the Olympian Muses, daughters of Zeus the aegis-holder.

Them in Pieria did Mnemosyne (Memory), who reigns over the hills of Eleuther, bear of union with the father, the son of Cronos, a forgetting of ills and a rest from sorrow. For nine nights did wise Zeus lie with her, entering her holy bed remote from the immortals. And when a year was passed and the seasons came round as the months waned, and many days were accomplished, she bare nine daughters, all of one mind, whose hearts are set upon song and their spirit free from care, a little way from the topmost peak of snowy Olympus. There are their bright dancing-places and beautiful homes, and beside them the Graces and Himerus (Desire) live in delight. And they, uttering through their lips a lovely voice, sing the laws of all and the goodly ways of the immortals, uttering their lovely voice. Then went they to Olympus, delighting in their sweet voice, with heavenly song, and the dark earth resounded about them as they chanted, and a lovely sound rose up beneath their feet as they went to their father. And he was reigning in heaven, himself holding the lightning and glowing thunderbolt, when he had overcome by might his father Cronos; and he distributed fairly to the immortals their portions and declared their privileges.

These things, then, the Muses sang who dwell on Olympus, nine daughters begotten by great Zeus, Cleio and Euterpe, Thaleia, Melpomene and Terpsichore, and Erato and Polyhymnia and Urania and Calliope, who is the chiefest of them all, for she attends on worshipful princes: whomsoever of heaven-nourished princes the daughters of great Zeus honour, and behold him at his birth, they pour sweet dew upon his tongue, and from his lips flow gracious words. All the people look towards him while he settles causes with true judgements: and he, speaking surely, would soon make wise end even of a great quarrel; for therefore are there princes wise in heart, because when the people are being misguided in their assembly, they set right the matter again with ease, persuading them with gentle words. And when he passes through a gathering, they greet him as a god with gentle reverence, and he is conspicuous amongst the assembled: such is the holy gift of the Muses to men. For it is through the Muses and far-shooting Apollo that there are singers and harpers upon the earth; but princes are of Zeus, and happy is he whom the Muses love: sweet flows speech from his mouth. For though a man have sorrow and grief in his newly-troubled soul and live in dread because his heart is distressed, yet, when a singer, the servant of the Muses, chants the glorious deeds of men of old and the blessed gods who inhabit Olympus, at once he forgets his heaviness and remembers not his sorrows at all; but the gifts of the goddesses soon turn him away from these.

Hail, children of Zeus! Grant lovely song and celebrate the holy race of the deathless gods who are for ever, those that were born of Earth and starry Heaven and gloomy Night and them that briny Sea did rear. Tell how at the first gods and earth came to be, and rivers, and the boundless sea with its raging swell, and the gleaming stars, and the wide heaven above, and the gods who were born of them, givers of good things, and how they divided their wealth, and how they shared their honours amongst them, and also how at the first they took many-folded Olympus. These things declare to me from the beginning, ye Muses who dwell in the house of Olympus, and tell me which of them first came to be....


-FJ

Anonymous said...

Last post...I promise...

Nietzsche, "Zarathustra"

ONE evening went Zarathustra and his disciples through the forest; and when he sought for a well, lo, he lighted upon a green meadow peacefully surrounded by trees and bushes, where maidens were dancing together. As soon as the maidens recognised Zarathustra,
they ceased dancing; Zarathustra, however, approached them with
friendly mien and spake these words:
Cease not your dancing, ye lovely maidens! No game-spoiler hath come to you with evil eye, no enemy of maidens.
God's advocate am I with the devil: he, however, is the spirit of gravity. How could I, ye light-footed ones, be hostile to divine
dances? Or to maidens' feet with fine ankles?
To be sure, I am a forest, and a night of dark trees: but he who is not afraid of my darkness, will find banks full of roses under my
cypresses.

And even the little God may he find, who is dearest to maidens: beside the well lieth he quietly, with closed eyes.
Verily, in broad daylight did he fall asleep, the sluggard! Had he perhaps chased butterflies too much?
Upbraid me not, ye beautiful dancers, when I chasten the little God somewhat! He will cry, certainly, and weep- but he is laughable even when weeping!
And with tears in his eyes shall he ask you for a dance; and I myself will sing a song to his dance:
A dance-song and satire on the spirit of gravity my supremest, powerfulest devil, who is said to be "lord of the world."-
And this is the song that Zarathustra sang when Cupid and the maidens danced together:

Of late did I gaze into thine eye, O Life! And into the unfathomable did I there seem to sink.
But thou pulledst me out with a golden angle; derisively didst thou laugh when I called thee unfathomable.
"Such is the language of all fish," saidst thou; "what they do not fathom is unfathomable.
But changeable am I only, and wild, and altogether a woman, and no virtuous one:
Though I be called by you men the 'profound one,' or the 'faithful one,' 'the eternal one,' 'the mysterious one.'
But ye men endow us always with your own virtues- alas, ye virtuous ones!"
Thus did she laugh, the unbelievable one; but never do I believe her and her laughter, when she speaketh evil of herself.
And when I talked face to face with my wild Wisdom, she said to me angrily: "Thou willest, thou cravest, thou lovest; on that account alone dost thou praise Life!"
Then had I almost answered indignantly and told the truth to the angry one; and one cannot answer more indignantly than when one "telleth the truth" to one's Wisdom.
For thus do things stand with us three. In my heart do I love only Life- and verily, most when I hate her!
But that I am fond of Wisdom, and often too fond, is because she
remindeth me very strongly of Life!
She hath her eye, her laugh, and even her golden angle-rod: am I responsible for it that both are so alike?
And when once Life asked me: "Who is she then, this Wisdom?"- then said I eagerly: "Ah, yes! Wisdom!
One thirsteth for her and is not satisfied, one looketh through veils, one graspeth through nets.
Is she beautiful? What do I know! But the oldest carps are still lured by her.
Changeable is she, and wayward; often have I seen her bite her lip, and pass the comb against the grain of her hair.
Perhaps she is wicked and false, and altogether a woman; but when she speaketh ill of herself, just then doth she seduce most."
When I had said this unto Life, then laughed she maliciously, and shut her eyes. "Of whom dost thou speak?" said she. "Perhaps of me?
And if thou wert right- is it proper to say that in such wise to my face! But now, pray, speak also of thy Wisdom!"
Ah, and now hast thou again opened thine eyes, O beloved Life! And into the unfathomable have I again seemed to sink.-

Thus sang Zarathustra. But when the dance was over and the maidens had departed, he became sad.
"The sun hath been long set," said he at last, "the meadow is damp, and from the forest cometh coolness.
An unknown presence is about me, and gazeth thoughtfully. What! Thou livest still, Zarathustra?
Why? Wherefore? Whereby? Whither? Where? How? Is it not folly still to live?-
Ah, my friends; the evening is it which thus interrogateth in me. Forgive me my sadness!
Evening hath come on: forgive me that evening hath come on!"


-FJ

Anonymous said...

Remind you of a "fish story" of long ago warren?

-FJ

Warren said...

FJ, you "torpedoed" me there. The "fish story" may have been old, but not my understanding.

:^)

"Of late did I gaze into thine eye, O Life! And into the unfathomable did I there seem to sink.
But thou pulledst me out with a golden angle; derisively didst thou laugh when I called thee unfathomable."


FJ, Post away!

I always read your posts and I suspect others do as well even if they feel somewhat intimidated. I suspect that a great many scamper for the library, as I have, even if they don't feel qualified to comment.

Sir, you are always welcome here, and I mean that!

nanc said...

well, i enjoy the farmer's posts also, but he is no midget without attitude.








short and sweet!

nanc said...

p.s. - farmer - i'm still trying to figure out when bleu cheese has gone bad.

Always On Watch said...

Warren,
FJ, Post away!
I always read your posts and I suspect others do as well even if they feel somewhat intimidated. I suspect that a great many scamper for the library, as I have, even if they don't feel qualified to comment.


I love it when Farmer comes to my blog. I learn something nearly every time he posts a comment. Do I understand all the material? No.

Last summer, Farmer inadvertently helped me out with a student who hates to read. Bingo! The student read the book and loved it. And one reason he was interested in reading the book was that Farmer had cited it. How's that for some proxy teaching on Farmer's part?

Nanc,
I'm a guru to a few other bloggers, even with my limited knowledge. Pretty funny.

nanc said...

i believe the farmer is great! he has a scenario for EVERY situation. and i don't mind feeling inadequate next to him.

the merry widow said...

Wisdom and folly are represented by women in Proverbs! My contribution.

tmw

Always On Watch said...

Rosie has a bodyguard! See this.

Always On Watch said...

Merry Widow,
Ah, the paradoxes of the Bible.

nanc said...

skillettmw - you calling me a wiseacre?

Anonymous said...

I hate to say it but the intimidation tactic is intentional... it's a little harder to argue against a certified genius like Nietzsche instead of a midget w/attitude... a false-authority syndrome ploy... a scarey lookin' avatar seems to work pretty good too, I've heard.

;-)

-FJ

Warren said...

FJ,
You've heard correctly!

Humans are more than animals but they respond in similar fashion to certain things.

Hey! It worked for the Batman and the Shadow!

Bwaaa ha ha ha ha ha!

;^)

drummaster2001 said...

whoa, i am late to this shindig, college stuff has been a very occupying thing. anyway, congrats to you nanc. you now have a voice in the blogosphere where you can POST on anything you want, not just comment.

nanc said...

thank you drummaster. you are a youthful force to be reckoned with and i appreciate any input you have.

Warren said...

Hey DM!

How you doing?

the merry widow said...

Me? Call FoxyNanc O'Malley a wiseacre? Only her stretch and kick sister Skillet would DARE do such a thing! And only at the O'Malley family barbeque! Sheesh, why would you think I'd do such a thing. I'm shocked Nanc, shocked I say!

Well of course I was! Just enshrining a Biblical principle.

tskilletmo'malleyw

Mr. Beamish the Instablepundit said...

So, how much is Warren chargin' for rent?

nanc said...

how do you know that it is he charging me, beamish?

Warren said...

Mercenary nature of the Cherokee genes.

:^)

Want to buy some first class snake oil?

LOL

MissingLink said...

Congratulations,
What a kick-ass-team!!

nanc said...

that's quite a compliment coming from you linkster, you with your ornery avatar and all. wouldn't want to run into one of those on my way to the outdoor loo!

and no, before anybody asks, we do not have an outhouse, we have a summer kitchen, bathhouse combo not attached to our main structure. it is out near where we hang and barbecue and put up a pool in the summer for when we have unwanted company!

drummaster2001 said...

warren:

i am exhausted. so much work ro be done, but only 30 [school] days until it's done. i finished all my college stuff [except final transcript and health documents]. i plan on posting an article on H.V. about America and immigration and college.