Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Dogcatpig, A tasty holiday treat

Prepared and deboned dogs can usually be acquired from Chinese, Korean or Vietnamese restaurants once they realize your are not from the department of health or the local police. However, if you wish to provide your own (from say, a neighbor with a noisy dog), here are some instructions.

First procure and remove the hair from one medium sized black, (black dog is best!) dog, (25 to 30 lbs do not skin!). Remove and discard the paws and lower legs at the second joint. Remove internal organs from the dog and discard.

nanc note: black dog is best, however it gives me a little heartburn so a brindle is always nice...

tmw note:A nice Chinese mustard sauce is excellent for the dog part of the entree, use 1 tblsp. of water to every 1 tsp. of mustard powder, blend well. You DO NOT want any lumps!

Using a pair of kitchen shears or a sharp boning knife, cut the backbone from the dog.

nanc note: i much prefer garden loppers on the thicker bones.

Using the tip of the boning knife, carve down the right side of the dogs ribcage, separating flesh from bone. Be careful not to cut through the backside of the chest skin.

Snap the upper leg joint from the dog shoulder blade and cut through the cartilage.
Leave the bones in the dog legs for presentation.

Continue cutting, following the ribcage and around the "wishbone", separating the dog meat from the ribs down to the thigh joint. Be careful not to cut through or pierce the skin connecting the two chest halves.

nanc note: i get the wishbone!

tmw: I want a slice of the breast...

Grasp the leg with one hand. Find the upper thigh joint where it connects to the dog pelvis with the other hand and press forward with your thumb on the joint while pulling toward you by the bottom of the leg. The joint should break. Cut through any connecting cartilage, taking care not to cut the skin.

Carve dog meat from the top side of the thigh bone and remove bone.

Scrape meat from the upper thigh bone, taking care to leave skin intact. Pop the joint, cut through the cartilage, and remove upper thigh bone. Leave lower leg bone in for presentation.

Repeat process on the other side of the carcass, taking care around the chest to leave the skin intact and attached.

You now have a deboned dog ready for stuffing with a cat.

Finding a prepared cat is somewhat problematic. Cantonese restaurants have been known to sell an occasional kitty carcass And even though it is said that the Cantonese will eat anything with four legs but the table and anything with wings but a 747, certain unscrupulous individuals have been known to sell rabbit carcasses as cats.

nanc note; why that's devious!

tmw:Poor little bunny rabbits!

If you are unable to find a prepared kitty carcass you can prepare your own.

The kitty carcass should be placed in a boiling pot of water for about 10 minutes to facilitate skinning and as we know there is more than one way to ....

Deboning a cat is basically the same as deboning a dog But remove the cats legs completely. There is hardly any meat on a cats legs.

tmw: The proper sauce for a cat is horseradish; 1 cup sour cream and 2-4 tblsp. freshly grated horseradish. A nice fresh wasabi is also appropriate.

The proper way to prepare a guinea pig for Docatpig:

First the guinea pig should be dressed. Since dressing a guinea is a matter of personal preference I took the following photos as suggestions.




The the guinea pig should be rolled tightly in the deboned kitty carcass which should be placed inside the deboned dog carcass then sewn tightly shut with an old shoe string.

tmw: For the pig, may I suggest a nice barbeque sauce? Use; 2 cloves of crushed garlic, 1 1/2 tsp. salt, 1 tsp. pepper, 1/4 cup finely chopped onion, 2 tsp. prepared mustard, 1 tsp. dry mustard, juice of 1 lemon, 1 1/2 cups ketchup, 1/2 cup tomato juice and 1 tsp. tarragon. Place all ingredients in a glass qt. jar and shake.

Place the Docatpig in a large roasting pan and cook at 425 degrees for six hours. Remove from oven, surround with new potatoes and green beans, recover and place in oven for two hours. Remove from oven and let set for one half hour before serving.

Serve surrounded with potatoes and green beans. ladle juice over meat and veggies.


WHAT? no green bean cassarole?

Uhhhhhh, I forgot the mushroom soup.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

You can't hide from my wrath!

(looking under the stuff in the sidebar)



aha! think you can boss me around?!?

she runs - she hides!

Monday, November 10, 2008


cartoon courtesy

have you hugged yours today?


as my daddy used to say, "if you give a tyrant an inch - they'll want to be a ruler!"

truer words never spoken.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008


genesis 12:3 and I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.

psalm 122:6 pray for the peace of jerusalem: they shall prosper that love thee.

2 chronicles 7:14 if my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

from israel today:

"Palestinian leader Mahmoud Abbas on Wednesday said he was happy Barack Obama had won the US presidency, but reminded the president-elect that he expects serious change in Washington's approach to the Israeli-Arab peace process.

In remarks carried by Israel National News, Abbas said Obama must not repeat the mistakes of President George W. Bush, and must apply greater pressure on Israel to make the territorial concessions he says are necessary for peace.

Hamas leaders in the Gaza Strip also said they were satisfied with Obama's victory, but similarly warned him to spurn the path of Bush and previous presidents."

it is this not-so-humble poster's opinion we have insulted the Almighty. may He forgive and protect u.s. i believe in my heart and mind this nation is under judgment and the judgment we receive is in direct proportion to how we treat israel and how we choose to live and to what we turn a blind eye. may the Lord's hedge of protection be about your homes and places of employment.

Monday, November 03, 2008

The day before election day

As we count down to the remaining hours of this election, Longrange urges its readers who have not yet voted to continue listening to what the candidates are saying; feel free to question their rhetoric.

If it is true that most Americans are worried about the economy, then there is no reason to vote for Barack Obama. None. If readers need a quick review, they will find an excellent crib-sheet of the Obama/McCain platforms at
Jus’ Sayin'; check it out.

Ultimately, American voters and the Electoral College will make the final decision as to which candidate will serve as our next president. This is not the time to be lulled into accepting false promises and sugar coated solutions to serious challenges. We hope (and pray) Americans will select the one candidate who will best serve the interests of our Nation. Chose wisely, America.